Let your dog doo-doo in your yard!

Ok this must be told and I will move on about doo-doo! To all owners of dogs listen to this! Where I have stayed before I move we had a big neighborhood meeting about dog pooh in yard! See I don't know how it's done in your neck of the woods but in mine we walk dogs! And it seem like that my yard was the ideal spot for dog to stop and crap! And the people didn't care they just left it behind! And it was a nightmare to walk in the grass! On both sides of me my neighbors hand concrete or asphalt in front and I had grass in mine and mine was in the middle of the two so every day I had to get up and move doo-doo off my grass for awhile it did not get to me to do this why? I like doing things in the yard so I didn't mind! Until one day my wife cross the grass before I got up and all I heard was no no not my shoes! Man this was some really bad shit! It had corn in it carrots in it golden slime and a smell to kill a horse with so my wife flipped out and said these famous words "why can the do it in their own yard?" very good question that I did not have an answer to! Now I was partly to blame because I never said to any one please don't let your dog doo-doo in my yard. So it was time for the neighborhood watch meeting where every body will be tonight and she asked me to say something at the meeting so I said ok! So later on that day one of the finest neighbors came down the street with her pit-bull and I said to my self as fine as she is why the hell she got a dog like that to walk? So I just blowed it off but my wife who was in the front room did not when the lady came pass our yard and the dog started to handle his business and my wife freaked out she call me and sent me straight to the lady! Well I didn't mind because I never had a word with that fine azz lady so here's my chance to just see if my skills was still in me! STOP AND DON'T GET IT TWISTED! I love my wife and don't have any mind to cheat! But the thrill of the game is still there! So I went up to the long legged big booty young tender freak and I wanted to say baby let your freak flag fly let it fly! Just didn't know how true that phase really is but you see soon! The young lady told me how she change her dog food and he had the runs! Me being me just spit some game laugh it off and she ask are you coming to the meeting tonight? Now I know my wife will be working tonight so I said game on! Sure I will be there and if I'm there before you I'll get a seat across from you so we can both be on the same page! Now pay close attention to this she had the biggest camel toe in front that I had ever seen! Men understand! ladies don't hate! So at meeting things was fine until we start making jokes about how dogs is and how they don't care and I said yeah we men like it doggy style too! and all of a sudden that big camel toe was growing I said to my self what the heck? The more we talk the more it grew! At this point I didn't give a damn about her dog hell no I mean his damn dog! Its a man! And he was fine as hell but not that fine! I talked so much shit after that that no one let their dog come near my lawn again! Remember seeing is not believing! peace pastorsvoice!

toilet therapy !

Hey it's me again this makes the best therapy that you can own you don't need appointment no body to give you the play game you know you walk in and some azz wipe who's job is to hold you up so the doctor can finish shooting the bull with the people in back or two waiting rooms just to make you think that they are on time when you get there first all money is talked about and where is your cards to pay for it then they take you in back to a second waiting room to watch TV and talk to some one who on the street won't give you the time of day! Then you get to go to your room and wait some more! And when you leave you still feel like crap because all he did ask a few question and gave a few pieces of paper to drive more to just wait on some one who is not glad to see you why it's more work! Well I got a answer take it to the toilet! Yes the "John" why think of how much relief this lovely thing gives you! As you see in the beginning it was hot smelly and made of wood but we came a long way baby just look how cool it looks man it's made of gold! Ok you don't get it listen what makes you be so glad to get to it when you are push? What wait on you and not you on it? What is the best thing to puke in? When number 1 or 2 comes to the for front what is ready not you hand not the kitchen neither the bed room will please you! But when you stand in front of it or sit on it the feeling makes you say ahhh! Listen we should give this thing a degree in helping solving a major problems! Now many take this thing so lightly but in morning late at night and all thru the day you go to it and give it your problem and it solve it! Man we need to make a day of celebration to honor it for it's years of this country service! Never ever back down from a job that nothing else want to do! It will choke it self just for your relief man this they have went to battle to get rid of the un-wanted can you ask more? Ok this thing goes both ways your face or butt can fit so good! Heck it got so advance that most will never stop getting rid of and thing you put in it's way! Stop treating it like it is the last thing on this earth man it's better than slice bread! Some is so quiet that you never hear it coming! Some make you dance before you get to it! Boy it's man best friend move over dog there's a new friend in town and every one love it and every one has at lease one of them! Well next time you think of killing your self go sit down and talk to it heck every shrink need to throw out the chair or couch and get one in it's place sit the people down on it and talk and see how calming it can be or give them a book and see how long they stay there! Ok last but not lease if you are drunk out your mind you can go to sleep on it now what bed? What you have to say now? This need to catch on and every one that has one hug and talked to it one time or another most told it I'll never do this again! And swear that no more if you just stop me and make me feel better and what happen you feel better THE TOILET KING OF PORCELAN!PEACE PASTORSVOICE

blowing a chance!

Ok this is a topic that needs to be address! How we blow so many chances to get one thing right what is that one thing LIFE! Oh boy we are so good at making a mess of things but is so poor of getting them right! Love we mess it up your friends we blow the trust family we just over look that we are family jobs we do stupid things to get fired wet dreams we can't get dry! And some times we mess up by not just shutting the hell up we talk ourselves into shit that we never wish to happen watch men make babies with women and know that they do want to take care of them women get a good man and just dog him out and we wonder why is it that when we do get it right we can't handle it! So here's a plan just slip out the back jack make a new plan Stan no need to be coy Roy just listen to me hop on the bus gus don't need to discuss much drop off the key lee and set your self free! Oh that's 50 ways to leave your lover! Ok let's try this go to his face grace chop him in the neck beck bust her in the knee Steve poke him in his eye why so he can't see punch her is her gut rush no need to run son because jail you be see! No that don't work ok one more chance to get this right! Don't you tarry Carrie because you lied to Larry and did not get marry why you slept with Jerry who was really Shirley kick him oh I mean her ok them in the nuts oh he no I mean she ok they don't have nuts made balls hell no that not all WTF. We all is a mess up chance blowing nation that has no chance of getting another chance to get the chance right! Forget it man screw like rabbits and blow all that you don't know you are blowing because if you don't blow it then how can you mess stuff up and if you do crap out a tear in the bucket and flush it! Shit happens and we is knee deep is our own shit and we don't need more shit to full our shit tank! Why most is full of shit or is just a piece of shit or born by shit did I say shit I'm sorry I meant doo-doo number2 stinky stuff poo-poo bubble guts boo boo bowel movement gut release The big bomb sorting papers taking a dump crap! See how we blow a chance this was a clean blog but now it full of shit! or coc-coc pictures of Kim kardashing did I spell her name right? See another blown chance to see how a beautiful young lady can acted like shit! Sorry to the kimie's fans. I was until she open her mouth then all I wanted to do was bang her but so many beat me to the punch! And now she is at war with fat! Heck another blown chance she is knock up now! Bummer! She still is a fine piece of shit that can grace my toilet any time! TOT_TOT FOR NOW! peace pastorsvoice!

Happiness goes and comes!

Happiness is something every one has one time or another. Right? Well this is for the lover in you all that can dig this will smile! Let's spit this! Happiness to gain a feeling to move and grove to a beat that make your heart skip and your hips dip! You do what normally you won't do you go when you used to stay home the day is smooth when this is happening to you and you wish it never leave. But to the lover it's a must to feel happy! Why Men will open doors for you they will cut their time just to make it to you they will sit and listen to you when happiness is around! No it's not about sex when happiness is aboard. Just to make you smile or to see the way you move your hair or to hear your voice man that what's up! Women make a man complete most will say I don't need a woman but remember your mama was one and if she did not went nine months you will still be in your daddy nuts sack! So to happiness with a women is the joint that make us men strive so hard to have a life. Now to you who don't like women why you act like them more than they do? I'm talking to the men that feel they don't need a woman! You women just don't know how much you mean to a real man that need some one to grow old with and have a family! I tilt my hat to you! Hell I'll put my body down so your feet will not get wet on a rainy day you are a prize that never get dull! But when you leave we try to fill that space with another one that can't fill what you left! She is what we settle with. Sure if we stay long enough we will re-gain happiness but to lose your soul mate it take a lot out of you! Most men will not own up to this they try to act hard but behind close doors they hurt like hell and miss the happiness you bring to their life! Now you will say I'm in love or he hen peck or he is soft. No I'm just what you wish you can be a Man that know his life needs a woman to make a smile in the morning when I wake up before her and look in her face and say how much she make my life and kiss her on her lips and smell her perfume and touch her soft skin man this is happiness that you can't get when you is still a little boy and don't know what toy he want to play with! Yeah yeah you say I don't want a relationship go right ahead and be alone bitter and can't trust no one but for me the pillow is not enough to keep me warm a soft good smelling tender lips curvy hips nice legs two twins man where can I begin! This is my friend my hanging partner my lover my help my reason my motivation my push my support my backbone why behind every good man there's a damn good woman hell if no one else say I say I need you why my world is not worth living in if there was no you! To All THAT SAY NO GOD SAID IT'S NOT GOOD FOR MAN TO BE ALONE SO HE TOOK A RIB OUT OF HIM AND MADE WOMAN! TO KEEP HIM FROM BEING ALONE! So you can say what you will Pastorsvoice say's thank you god for such a good idea! Woman= my happiness peace pastorsvoice! Here diamonds is the best way to say hell yeah! You are special!A BIG ONE TOO!

Bad Azz kids!

Good day mates! Want to go on a trip? This is to all that ride a plane train bus don't you hate when this bad azz kid is kicking the seat or just being a pain in the azz! You need to start like we are playing a game take the window out and tell them lets play a game call flip! Flip out this window and lets see how your azz hit the train and i'll count how many times you flip! Or let's play dive you go and ask the bus driver or plot to let you see cockpit and dive your azz out and let the bus run you over or the plane motor suck you in and brun your bad azz up! How about the ones that stick their tongues out at you hell I want to punch them in their mouth so the dentist can wire their mouth shut so they can lick it out no more I know I'll go to jail hell that's what I want so I cant kick his daddy azz for putting that bad azz kid in his mother! Ok I'm a butt hole but 5 hours on the bus with a kid that his mother is so tried that she just act like she don't see this kid taking over the bus! And when you say something to that brat she gets all offended when she knew she wanted to do the same thing to the kid but was scared of what people might say! Well I don't care what the azz wipes say I want to get from point A to point B in one piece! This is another thing change that baby! Don't just sit there and act like you don't smell nothing! The baby has blown a gut buster! And everyone but you smell it! Most ladies show just how they take care of the kids at home hey everyone has a bad day and with those kids you might have more bad days they us but just think my day was good until this beast got on the bus in front of me and I just want to beat the hell out of it and make it sit its azz down! Now you think its so cute when the brat curse at someone ok give this kid 15years and see how funny it is when you wake up and this cute cussing kid is over you with a bat saying kiss my azz! Now I have kids and I know kids will be kids but when these kids don't acted like a kids then its my turn to and like a grandparent and get that little bit! See back in the day when anyone who was old enough to be your mother can cut that azz and no one mind why it take a lot of help to raise a respectful child all that was in it life had to train it! Now when you got three people living in the house grandmother and mother and daughter and all got a man all party at the same club and all is trying to be so fine how the hell can this child know respect? Watch this! All is wearing the shortest dress that they can wear and all is taking each other man and a new man is in the house every Friday night! Then you say don't be a whore! WTF? To all the bad azz kids I don't blame you I blame the ones that is showing you how to live! Remember monkey see monkey do! Time out is fine for the ones who listen but some you just have to beat the shit out of them to let them know you don't rule this house! And to the ones that say I don't agree trade kids for a while and see how you will do when they have your azz in time out! Now look at the picture at bottom and know these can be your kids if you don't beat that azz! peace pastorsvoice!

Man she"s cock blocking!

Well well back again! Sorry so long but I been moving and trying to get house right for my wife! Speaking of wife this blog is something her sister and friend was very good at! THEY WERE THE MAIN COCK BLOCKERS IN THE WORLD BUT I WON! See we call them cheese burgers why? Dry bun but had a lot of mess in them and you know if you eat to much cheese it will be hard to doo-doo! See they had every thing in common with a cheese burger! Good for one thing a quick pain in the gut! See men cock block different we throw salt in the game but you woman can't take a hint! To get the hell out you give her the eye to find something else to do but she will sit right there and say I'm not leaving or you think you was going to get lucky but not on my watch! Or always have some crying problem that can't wait and she will sit her azz between us and start with all that mouth about something that if she would have kept her big mouth close she would not have a problem! But men know if I got a woman in the room and the sock is on the door get the heck out or don't come your begging azz in! Or if we out at the club and you get a lady then you on your own and if I get a lady and if you don't have a car and you are riding with me back seat is your place and you go home first! But nooooo! not you ladies! You will hang your stinky azz around and say stuff like I'm bored! You are so bored because you came your azz out and know your mouth always write a check that you big azz can't cash! Or you mad because no one want your stupid acting non-friendly never happy onion smelling bad breath you cheese burger we can tell you been taking Tylenol why you have no tail at all! You butt is flat as a board and if my house need one then your gut will block the nail! Ok lets be real all the ladies will say we will match our outfits look big girls do need to wear stretch pants or spandex! Why too many humps and bumps and we have not pass your ankles! Oh don't you hate the ones that all way comes but never get anyone! That's why a good look lady who just want drinks and no action will bring a troll with her to say I'm ready to go home so she can say I can't just leave her! Heck we leave our home boys all the time and then the next morning listen to them wine and moan about how we left them at the club! But they know the rule! Women don't have any! Hell leave that beast let her walk why at lease the bugs will like her that's why all of them is all ways around her! Last but not lease let the two cock blockers get together and all go on a double date so both can say how much they hate each other so those double cheeseburgers can be so messy that the ones who was having a good time have another chance to go out! see picture don't worry it did not hurt he have no nuts to hurt why he been lost them by cock blocking! peace pastorsvoice!

The mastermind jello shots!

Oh dip! This is a trip. What is this that has past my lips! This took place at a party that I tried to fit in. See I'm not a drinker and don't smoke weed anymore coke makes me feel to crazy and boded acids just keeps me high too long! So me with my stupid self went to a party with close friends to get out the house when we got there the party was off the hook! Man people was every where so me trying not to be a dip ship you know what a dip ship is right if not this is what we call a dip ship one who is one side and did not need to be there! So I mingle and they started to offer me something to eat and then the drinks came out but I did not drank! So now me being my self and didn't want any one to notice that I was not drinking there on the kiddie table was the mastermind to my making a azz out of my night! So at first I didn't took any but as this fine azz freak start to roll on me the dog came out! There was no way this tender piece of azz was getting away somebody daughter was in trouble to night bang bang was my name! So she who had much experience in holding her booze you know the kind that you can say my chic bad my chic good my chic do what you wish your chic could! She said try this it looked so harmless hell jello! Who will be afraid of freaking jello! So I ate a green one and it tasted good could not tell that booze was in there so we was getting to know one another dancing and me and her was on point! Ok this is where the shit hits the fan! Me with my bad self started to eat the jello and not giving the booze time to kick in after a while this damn jello start talking to me saying eat some more! Now my body was smart it said no stop that's enough! But my two heads said hell no you got some booty to bang You need a kick to go long and strong because this fine red bone don't need a minute man tonight she need long john Wong to cap her night off! The two heads said try the pudding! Now all that green yellow blue jello I had all ready ate that had white booze in it! Now here is the mix people say don't mix your liquor it will make you drunk quicker! But all my two heads was seeing was this red bone with this hot azz body that was digging me so I left the jello and went to pudding! These two jello's fooled me that I was the life of the party and that red bone did not help any she was my fuel to get wild! Shots off tidy's shots off azzes! shots off thighs and one shot from between the red bone legs! That when this big azz ape with hair on his hands said alright that it lets go! Heck the jello said who is this ape talking to? Well he was talking to his wife that my head was between her legs getting a jello shot out of! Now the jello said hell no he is not going to take this piece of azz from me all the work I put in to get it to grove with me! So when he grab her arm and pull her off the table this damn jello said it's on now that jello told me I was 10 feet tall and bullet proof! Well why jello lie so bad! This jello mastermind the azz kicking of a life time and it was not that hairy ape who got his azz kick it was the one who thought he was the life of the party! Man this man hit me so hard that the jello said damn! And the dumb thing about it was he was kicking my azz and I knew it! And could not stop it! My friends was at the movies staring me! After they got his foot out my azz! I with my stupid self looked at the red bone and said call me! What I did that for this ape and his friends came and whip me my friends azz mess up my car with us and then left with that pretty red bone! Listen do not I repeat do not ever ever listen to jello it will get you killed! peace pastorsvoice!

lost in my zone!

First lets get all bull shit out the way! So what life is a bumpy road! It's time for a wake up call you are in my zone! In here you be you! Don't be fake because that's all you will get is fake smiles fake friends fake feelings most of all fake sense of belonging! Ok look at this life and say don't no more! We as men need to be there for ours sons and daughters! Stop putting it all on the woman listen a woman can't be a father and a man can be a mother each can act like each other but can be the other! Now I know most who have only one parent have heard this they is my mother and father! But I never known my father and my mother was a great woman but there was always a part missing! I act like a fool when other men who was not my dad came in my life why there was never a man in my life to begin with! So I never accept the love that they had for me! Now this is a blog for the family don't believe the hype that a man is not needed in a child's life or that a woman is not needed why a woman cares for the family way different than a man and a mother is what mold and shape a son to respect women and a man help a daughter to watch out for these sorry men who hurt our little girls! My zone is to change the way we are messing up the minds of the next set of mothers and fathers! And this has nothing to do with gay or straight this has all to do with how me as a son never got a chance to tell his dad how much he needed him to mold him into a man that his word was all he had! See this is why I joke so much in these blogs why because of all the hard stuff life gave me and never had a chance to know how to be that man who cares for his mate or to commit to be faithful to a woman see every one else can come out and say what they are inside but when you don't know what drives you to do the things you do how can you come out? No I'm not in battle with my sex it's more deeper then that! And not who I screw! There has been times when I got in my zone and you could not touch me why my zone is a salesman and in my zone you had my money in your pocket and I had to get it no just meant I did not convince you enough to give me my money! Do you feel me on this one? This was my zone and all the demons that haunt me could not get threw! But as all that my family was a big part to my hustle! When you have a family you don't know how it feel not to have one! All the gun fights in my house as I was growing up made me think that was a normal life! All the times I seen my mother beat shot slap kick until she was no more I thought that was the way to live! Until I had my own no one gave me a book on how to be a dad I had nothing to go by! Watch this and you decide! No uncles no aunts no grandparents on neither side! Nothing but strangers and most was drunk all the time! And you would say so what that don't matter! Hell did you grow up having sex at the age of six and then you talk! You grow up and by the age of 12 getting high! You grow up and see people that you trust break all rules of watching you by making you drunk and laughing at you on how you act! You step in my zone and had to depend on a family that at all time was against one or the other! This is crazy but leave it to beaver was my dream of how life need to be not the zone that I was in! Listen to love and keep is what make a family strong but in my growing up years only the strong survived and you could not be weak it's hard on the weak ones! They need the family to depend on! Now to you hard asses who say so what? This is why so much killing is going on because I wanted to just blast my grammar school year because they knew I did not have a daddy to come to be with me or my mother was off with her man and $20.00 was all me and my sister had to eat on for that week when she was gone! You tell your 7 year old and your 10 year old to live off $20.00 and see just how mess up their zone is! Further more to the hard asses that think they can bitch about life hell I made it so can you! Take all the bull shit and learn from it on how not to act! My zone is now in me and my family! peace pastorsvoice!get your hand out my cookies!

lost and won't say it!

Hey peep this have any one been riding with some one who is lost and won't admit it? This right here is a real trip! check this out! We went on vacation and I was driving so we got off the interstate and road to a store that was a few miles down the road. I stop at store and we all switch places. So my nephew was driving now I said go back the way we came and close my eyes and forgot he was sleep the whole way! So Mr. I know where I'm going took off so in my sleep we was stopping and going so realizing this is not a dream and in my mind knowing that on the interstate the only way you stop and go there must be a wreck! So I open my eyes and all I saw was fields and dirt! No traffic no four lanes and this numb nut is hauling azz down this road like he is still on the interstate! Hell I wanted to slap him in the back of his head but his father which was in the back seat with me was too big and he just whip a cousin azz about hitting his son and I was too far from home to take a azz whipping! Now when I went to sleep we just came off of I-10 suppose to be heading back to Pensacola Florida coming back from Shreveport Louisiana but we was 10 miles before we hit the Arkansas line! And listen you don't get out the car when four black men in a rental car driving up to a house asking where the hell am I? That's a good way to get your daily supply of iron! And heck I took my pill before we left Florida! This is what kicked it off WHY THE HELL YOU GOT GPS AND DON'T FOLLOW IT? You say that thing don't know what it's talking about! Listen when people act like they need their azz kick give them just what they want! Heck my cell phone said forget it you won't see any bars for a while! WTF is this? The road back to interstate was a straight road how can you get lost? The sign will say this way to interstate! Follow the arrow if you are mad at the GPS! IT'S A STAIGHT SHOT! But noooo! You can't tell MR. I know what I'm doing! Asshole you are going the wrong way and his big azz daddy is no better saying leave him alone he know where he's going! And you and your son never left Pensacola in your entire retarded life! So this fool pull in this bar that has a southern Dixie flag flying now I just known my azz was going to be whip either by this retard daddy or those long beard tobacco spiting people that was on the out side drink miller beer! And by the looks of them they did not just have one either! So against my better judgment this fool drive up and jumps out! Now about this time my mind say hell let his daddy kick your azz for not getting out to help his dumb azz son! At lease you can say numb nuts was stupid and his big azz daddy did not like it! So you know there is all ways one in the bunch that has a big mouth! The bearded man ask numb nuts can I help you are you lost? And this other black fool is going to bust out and say WTF can't you see we need help? Now at this time my mind said RUN but hell I was already lost where can I run? And the bearded man said excuse me? I just say he was talking to me SIR. And he just that stupid Now you know we was not in a good place if the big azz daddy tell the other one to shut the hell up! But looks can be deceiving they were nice people and they had a good laugh when one ask numb nuts how the hell you get lost with GPS? This only show men if you are lost just say so! And don't be a dick to asks for help! peace pastorsvoice!!!!

black on black where's the hope?

This blog hits close to home why my nine year old got jumped and beating by these older kids and she never had a fight in her nine years until I had to move in the hood! So this is my blog! Why is it acceptable for us to always hurt one another never see how we can be if we just respect a person for a person but in the hood they don't try to teach or help one or another if a child is shot no one know or they know but because of the life style no one tells! We never can be a force in this world if we fight among ourselves but to hate is all we black know we hate the white because we say slavery! But none pick any cotton none was force labor none was sold but the hate lives on. We hate the Mexicans because they will work and we won't we rather steal from one another or sell poison to someone mother to have all the support that is needed for that house to make it! We will rather turn our kids to hood rats gang bangers or whores, hookers instead of giving them the help to bring back the man of the house! You blame the man. And say he is hold you back! That's the biggest lie that ever fell out the side of your neck! We hold each other back to damn afraid that some one is going to have more that me! We hate all race because we say they hate us! Well if we start taking some accountability for the shit we do maybe we will start to be respected! But to the ones that left the hood you will agree you wanted a better live for your family right? We are taught to fight with fist and shoot with guns never to stick together and be one! You said that it was in grain in us when we was slaves? Well if you knew it was wrong why is we still doing it? Try to do what's right but when you call 911 you are wrong in the hood a sellout but when you stole all that I had well you say that's alright? Can't sit on your own porch why because you might get shot because they say this is their block but we pay the taxes to live in fear! Heck I don't want to go back to the way of the streets! My family needs me to show a better way! But we are told if you never been locked up you not a man! So many of us black men get locked up for the dumbest things and lose so much time from our sons and daughters! And the hood is spending so much time when you are not there! Now I face a nine year old asking me why do they pick on me my hair is long and I don't wear weave but they pick at me. I don't like to fight but I like friends but no one want to be because I won't do anything wrong! You tell us god will fight your battles but when they jump me I called but there was no answer! I feel that I have failed because of the choices I made to put her in this hell! Each day I look at my skin and wish it will go away! No one likes me not even blacks and I'm black what the hell is with that? Now the ones that stands for black pride this is what that make many blacks to feel that they can do what they want because I'm black and proud! This is not to get friends or your hand clap! This is real and is really some bull crap!I AM A PRESON AND MY SKIN DON'T SAY SHIT FOR ME SO AS FOR PRIDE IT CAN KISS MY BLACK AZZ! PEACE PASTORSVOICE WHEN IS MY LIFE FREE?

summertime hang ups!

Summertime summertime! It's a time for sun and fun! But it's hard on a married man why? Ok you women has a low rate for sex most can do without it for a long time! But for a man it's the first thing on his mind and the last thought on his brain when he get in bed! Well you may say that's sick but It is not sex is a beautiful thing and if you woman stop acting like your kitty cat is the only one in the world then you might can keep a man! But when we go to the mall or beach or just walking down the street especially in the summer and all that azz and those tidy's is just every where and the skin is tan brown and all the ladies is trying to get someone to notice just how good they can look in the outfit that they are wearing or who got the shorts is the shortest or who got the most leg and butt showing! It's hard on a man when all winter no booty! Or his wife put him in the dog house for the last month! How the hell you expect me not to look! And in the summer the club is crazy with free cookies to try! But naw you sit there with your tight azz saying you better not look! Now in my case I had to tell my wife heck if you think that us getting it on is not important then stop and see just how much a freaking smile and I love you got with no action! And we been married for 17years! Now you single numb nut will say how can you just be with one woman all that time? Well here's a tip just love her and respect her and give her all your heart! And think just how you will feel if she cheated on you! See one woman at a time is all you can please! You don't have time for you your wife and a woman on the side why someone is going to want more time and how can you do that when you don't have anymore time! Fella's I learn this in my running days you can't please two women and if you stop and look you are not pleasing the one you got! Listen this may not get the male vote for this blog but the one's that read it can have a strong bond with the one you truly love! Now to you women that think you got him wrap up! This is your call. Summertime is a play ground for the needy and you nag and pick hold back the good stuff! And think he will stay home hell if you don't feed a dog he will leave home and hang out at the neighbor's house or just look at a dog in heat no matter how many girl dogs you have he will leave them why they is not giving up the booty! Now to you who say I'm doing all I can to keep my man well who said he is a man? Many boys act like a man look like a man dress like a man but is still a boy! Last thing you can clean a pig up and put the pig in the best you can feed it the best but when the pig get back to it's pin it will still eat shit why? It is a pig and it eat it's shit! Now this go both ways you can take the hoe out the city but you can't take the city out of the hoe! peace pastorsvoice!!summertime hang ups

Tampons in my face!

Now I know I'm not the only one who watch TV and when you see a lady laying at the pool most of you is saying just like me Don't get you butt in the pool most do agree when you say on TV that it's my time of the month! We all know you are not fresh down there! But you jump you nasty fish smelling butt in and now think of all those people that water get in their mouth? Now you say heck that what chorine is for. Well how many of you want to swim in a public pool that you know every body is taking a piss in? Now add piss the nineteen men she slept with before her time of the month her fishy smelling azz and blood and left over douche from last month in your mouth nose ear face body! Now how would you fell if I just piss on you and then take a dump right by your head and wipe it in your mouth? Or the same one who got a g's string from her dick getting friend that no one wash and the string is in both azz all day it may look good on them but we all know when you take a dump and just wipe you butt it leaves a doo-dooo smell now all this is in your mouth don't for get the yeast infection that she got from that string just rubbing in that place that is in the middle of it's month cycle! Tampon I believe is for women because they have two holes and one is what it work in but a mans butt? I said in a azz!Why would you want to put a tampon in any azz! But a man WTF where is he going to put it in his azz? A Azz is only place that is made to dump out crap! But when you put crap in it do it hurt? Whoa! Are we really that stupid that we will say it's all right to stick a hard piece of tube in my azz? I know when I take a shit if it's hard this hurt my butt and I have to take a minute to let the pain stop! But just think you are walking around all day with this stuck in you azz! Sorry I don't give a flying flip who you screw! If you want to screw a slow ride to hell go right ahead! But to walk around with a piece of tube in your azz I can't see that crap! But who is me? Someone who is not going to walk around with a corn cobb in my azz! One more thing about this tampon thing! Most clean women DON'T LIKE YOU TO TOUCH THEM WHEN IT'S THEIR TIME! But to you nasty slack stinking heifers that pull your tampons out and don't have a clue that you are one slack heifer that leave that just laying around! This is for you! Someone need to clog your azz up and make it come out your neck! So you may just see how slack your azz is! Please think how slack this is how would you feel it I take a good dump in your house and leave it! peace pastorsvoice!!!!

This is really retarded even for me!

azz and caller ID

Now know you are asking your self what a azz with bugs on it have to do with caller ID? Listen to this and see why! To most people this thing can be so trouble some! And we look at this as another part of home device! But to a broke man it's his life line why when the bank calls he can catch another gear away from phone and just watch it! To a poor man when bill collators call he can say don't answer it! To the liar he can see the one who he lied on trying to get him straight! To the don't want to be talk to deaf he can see that talking person that never shut the hell up! And to the love sick person who used to have to waited by phone now he don't! Caller ID can be the biggest break thru to avoiding the butt wipe that all ways think that by calling you will make you do the bull that they are asking you to do! Now how bugs on a azz fit in? Well really it don't but in my sick mind it will! Who had crabs before? Well is you eat them that they call snow crabs see these thing float off all the people the go to beach and swim in salt water and the crabs swell up into snow crabs! NO I'm just kidding! The dude that got bugs on his azz and he did not have caller ID so when his girl called and told him don't get that or she will leave him well all he got left is the bugs on his azz! So see why this can be a life saver! And now you wondering where's the hook? Well here it goes all who have one will use the hell out of it and if you are wondering why they never call you back. Because they don't want to talk to you! See how my caller ID works! When some one call that you don't want them to know that you are home you can look at it and say heck no! No one pick that up! But to the starker to the talker to the ones that get you licks and kicks by calling me to sell me something that you know you don't want! This for you look on bottom of post and see just how I get by you all the time! Oh P.S I didn't pay my phone bill anyway so I don't need it! HE HE HE PEACE PASTORSVOICE!

psycho people!

This right here is real spit! To all the Looney tunes or the ones that know your elevator says 12th flood but it only go two 2th floor! You know how much the last one was that you dated was a psycho WHY OH WHY would you get another one then cry to me how unhappy you are! Just listen to me first you say I'm going to find me a man then you dress in the most short dress you can find and you show all you big o' tidy's and the first place you go is to the club! Where all the freaks are and then you let your freak flag fly go little freak let it fly! Then just because you are lonely and feel your clock is ticking you don't even try to see if I come to your house and on the first time we bang what do I need to come back for? Now here is the clicker! You know that you in the past you never ever picked a good one. How would this time you think you got a winner? Listen this six hundred pound bear at this time my act like a cute stuff bear but when this bear is poked here it comes a can of whip azz and you open it! People may look cool just hang around them for a few and keep that kitty cat dry for now! And use your better judgment! Do you wonder why you got him no one else want his sorry azz! Because this fool is still a kid in a candy store and you is on the shelf! Most make the mistake and tell a friend how good they got it! And this psycho bitch nut in her drawers! And time as she see him it's on and popping! And if you think A naked piece of azz is not a go getter! Next time he come in get butt naked and see how much he say no! And then you say how can my friend do this or I can believe he would do this! Well here real truth two for one is a good day for a dick! No he not a dick I'm talking about his dick! To burn down a new piece is heaven to him! this is the same reason he got with you at the club! Now you think well I go to church to find me a good man don't you know that is were all the dogs rome because they know that most women in there saying god send me a man and he says here I am your booty calls and I know you want me! Now I know we got some bold women out there that say I don't need a man these are the one's that play hard to get and this is what they want some one that they can say he love the chase! And now she feel so special and think she got a winner but just don't realize she is a beginner! Time has change! The game has change! And you still stuck in the past that why they used your Azz! If you got one! Here is your way out! Run you fool! peace pastorvoice!